10 Tips for Building Self Confidence


10 Tips for Building Self Confidence - Sara du Jour

One of the most common questions I get asked online is about how to build your confidence and feel good about yourself. 

In a world that literally functions based on telling people (especially women) that they’re not good enough as they are (yay, capitalism!), having confidence in the face of that onslaught is no easy feat.

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(Source: saradujour)

Asked by Anonymous

I really want to throw a murder mystery party! Where do you start? How do you get ideas for characters/the script?

I didn’t throw the party, so I don’t know much – sorry! All I know is that Wendy purchased a pre-planned game from somewhere, with set characters, instructions, storyline, etc.

(In future I’d really appreciate it if you and everyone else left comments/questions pertaining to a Sara du Jour blog post on the blog post itself. Thanks!)  :)


Asked by lostwithmargaret

Do you know of any ways to get over heart break?

Time. Distance. Good friends. Distractions. Hobbies. Family. Work. Meeting someone new. :)

I’m so sorry, I hope you feel better soon. <3 Eat some chocolate, phone a friend, or get lost in a really good book. xx

Asked by Anonymous

What kit do you use for your eyebrows? Any drugstore product recommendations for beginners?

Hello! I use plain old tweezers from the drugstore, I think mine are angled ones by Revlon. I fill them in slightly with a matte cool-toned brown eyeshadow on an angled eyeliner brush. :)

Asked by nostalgic-hermit

Hello Sara. I hope things are well. :) I really think you are someone kind, smart, and sensible (not to mention awesome!). May I ask for a piece of advise? How do you tell someone that you don't want something romantic with them without hurting them

and without them hating you or ruining the friendship? I have this workmate who was hitting on me and all the time I was just indifferent because I don’t want to lead him on but I also don’t want him to stop liking me. I just want us to be friends. How do I break the “bad news” to him without him hating me or him getting hurt? Sorry for the bother. I’ll wait for your reply though. I love you and stay awesome and beautiful! You inspire us.

Hello! First of all, thank you so much for the compliments! You’re very kind. As for your situation, I want you to know that you have done absolutely nothing wrong. You are well within your rights to desire a friendship with someone and nothing more.

But the fact is, rejection sucks, no matter how prettily you wrap it up. Rejection will hurt him a bit, but that’s just life. Nothing you can do to avoid it completely, and everybody faces rejection sometimes.

If this guy is a decent human being, he’ll respect your wishes and leave it at that. Hopefully he’ll be okay with keeping the relationship platonic and just being friends, but there’s also a possibility that’s not what he’s interested in and he may cut ties completely. There’s nothing you can do about that, and neither of you would be at fault in that situation.

I also want to state in the clearest terms possible that being friendly or being a friend to someone who is romantically/sexually interested in you IS NOT LEADING THEM ON. 

If you desire friendship with someone, being friendly to them is clearly stating your intentions. Being friendly to someone does not constitute flirting, nor does it necessarily mean you’re romantically or sexually interested.

As for what to say, I’d probably go with something like, “I think you’re a really great guy, but I just don’t feel that way about you, sorry.” Some people will tell you to say something like “I’m not looking for a relationship right now,” and while that can be effective, I think it’s unfair to you to have to block yourself off from all romantic connections just to spare the ego of this guy. What if the guy of your dreams walks in the next day? Are you going to pretend you’re still not interested in dating?

So yeah, I’d try to tell him as nicely as possible that he’s awesome, but he’s just not for you. Good luck! xx

Asked by Anonymous

Hello dear Sara! I'm sorry for taking some of your time but I really trust you when it comes to things like these. Just any suggestions would do. If you were to make a vintage themed logo (for Women's apparel) what design can you think of? Because I'm really running out of ideas this is for my project and nothing else. I'm stressed out thinking of one. I'm sorry if I'm asking you things like these for a project. Thank you in advance :) x

Hello! Vintage can mean a lot of things, so I’m not sure exactly which era you’re looking to emulate.

I hope some of these examples will inspire you! Good luck! x

Asked by Anonymous


You are so kind, thank you! :)

Asked by Anonymous

If you could have any talents, what would your dream job be?









*jazz hands*

No, but really. Theatre, especially musical theatre, is what I love most in the world, and it’s a tragedy that I’m a mediocre singer and actress, and a truly terrible dancer.

I’m morally against stage moms but I kind of wish my mom had been a little bit. 

What would you do? :)

Asked by princessaquarius

Hi Sara! I want to start reading Jane Austen and I wonder if you could tell me which of her books is most suitable for autumn? Thanks!

I’ve only actually read Pride and Prejudice and Sense and Sensibility, though I’m familiar with Emma and Mansfield Park though several film adaptations, too.

I don’t think I can speak to which is most apt to the season (I’ve never thought about books that way, it’s interesting!), but since Pride and Prejudice was my favorite read, I’ll recommend you go with that! Happy reading. xx

Asked by foughtthewolvesofpatience

From one Sara to another, hmmm, Sherlock?!

That’s tough! I adore that show to bits but I can’t say there’s a character I really relate to. I’d like to think I’m fairly sharp but I’m definitely no Sherlock. John’s a great character but I don’t necessarily see myself in him. Or Irene, or Moriarty, or Molly, or Mary, or Mycroft, or Mrs. Hudson. (My, that’s a lot of M-names!)

Maybe Lestrade, if pushed? Or Sgt Sally Donovan? (Thanks!)

Asked by Anonymous

i absolutely LOVE parenthood and grey's anatomy! :)

I haven’t watched Parenthood, but the first 5 or so seasons of Grey’s have a special place in my heart.

When I initially watched the show I related to Meredith 100%, almost scarily so, to the point where I could predict most of her actions because they were what I would have done, too. Now that I’m a few years older I find myself relating more and more to Cristina. :) Thank you!

Asked by Anonymous

The Hunger Games

Definitely Katniss. Though I relate to Peeta’s desire to rise above the situation and not be manipulated by it.

Thanks! :)

Asked by Anonymous

Hi, I was wondering what you used to edit your icon? It's lovely.

I did all the editing manually in Photoshop. I wish there was a quick app or filter to do that! :)

And thank you! x

Asked by Anonymous

What do you call those roofs usually most ice cream stores have? Those striped roofs. I need help, seriously. Thanks a lot if you'd help me.

I’m not sure if this is what you had in mind, but perhaps “awnings”? xx

Asked by Anonymous

What happened to your giveaway? Have you picked a winner yet? :)

I did, on September 1st as promised. I announced on Facebook & Twitter, but will ammend the blog post itself since a few people seem to have been left wondering. :)

Sorry you didn’t win, thanks for entering!